First choose a name for your country: Next you must choose a song for your country, do you want:
- A Love Song
- A Dance Song
- A Sad Ballad
- Abba cover ‘cause they won before.
Now the most important part of a Eurovision song is the chorus as this is the part that will get played over and over in the replays, so write your chorus. 1. Don’t you ever say, I just action verb (past) I will always verb you I can’t live noun, action verb, for my life I will always verb you I came in like a big object I never verb past so describing word in love All I wanted was to action verb your noun All you ever did was verb me Yeah, you, you verb me 2. Everything is describing word Everything is describing word when you’re part of a noun Everything is describing word, when you’re verb our noun. 3. I word on scale of hate to love to proverb but I couldn’t action verb I couldn’t action verb it I had verb past you’d see my body part and be reminded that for me it isn’t noun Never mind, I’ll verb someone like famous person I wish nothing but the noun for famous person too Don’t forget me, I beg, I remember you said sometimes four words of your choice, but sometimes two words of your choice instead Sometimes it four words of your choice but sometimes two words of your choice instead. 4. You are the action word title(Lord/lady etc) description and description Only number action word title Feel the beat from the musical instrument You can action You can action Having the time of your length of time sense(see etc) that girl sense that scene Digging the action word title Congratulations! Your song has made it through to the final! During the performance of your song, you get excited because you’re performing on Eurovision! You want to make your performance as memorable as possible to the viewers, do you: 1. Restrain yourself because you know your song is good enough without antics 2. Attempt a flip. 3. Crowdsurf.
- Restrain yourself because you know your song is good enough without antics. – you finish the song and go backstage to wait of news of the voting. You hear the presenters talking about how they can’t even remember how your song went. Do you:
1A) Go over there and tell them you song is awesome – the other acts laugh in your face because they can’t even remember how it went. You cry and drink until you can’t tell who’s giving 12 points to who. 1B) Gatecrash the stage to try and make your act more memorable – You don’t even make it onto the stage. Security at Eurovision is tight and 3 security guards carry you outside so you don’t even get to hear where your act placed. 1C) Ignore all the comments – You ignore all the comments about your song and concentrate on drinking. Unfortunately you get so drunk you think you’ve won and attempt to sing your song over the winning song. The whole crowd boos you. 2. Attempt a flip. – you can’t do flips. You fall flat on your back but you’re a professional and you get back up and carry on singing to the delight of the crowd. Do you: 2A) Attempt a flip again to make it look like part of the act – You fall on your back again and as a result you ruin the last note of the song. But maybe no-one noticed… 2B) Get somebody from the crowd up on stage and try to make them do a flip – They happily attempt it but fail even more than you did and the last part of your song is cut off by paramedics coming onto the stage to cart them off. Not good. 2C) Keep lying down on the floor and standing back up as if it’s part of the act – Your dancers don’t know what to expect from you next and keep tripping over you. One of them happens to yelp into your microphone as they fall and that is the part that get played in the replays 3. Crowdsurf. – no-one has ever crowd surfed in Eurovision before and the crowd are not expecting it. As a result they drop you and you have to remain singing your song in the crowd as if it was on purpose. Do you: 3A) Walk through the crowd high-fiving everyone – You carry on your song walking through the crowd, but you reach the end of the crowd before you’ve finished your song and have to walk back through the crowd in silence. No-one wants to high-five you again. It’s awkward. 3B) Stay at one spot on the crowd and pick one person to be friends with while you sing – The person you befriend and lets you know by head butting you when you try to make them contribute. You fail the ending of you song due to concussion. 3C) Run through the crowd towards the commentators’ booths – You don’t make it to the commentators’ booths, you shouted that that was where you were going and the crowd cheered, but you didn’t say you were going to do this in rehearsals, so security stop you and shepherd you back on stage and the people who just cheered you now boo you, because they’re fickle, fickle people. Voting. Answer these questions to the best of your knowledge to find out where you placed:
- What song did Abba win Eurovision with? Waterloo, Dancing Queen, Mamma Mia
- What was the last year the UK won Eurovision? 1997, 1996, 2000
- What year did Terry Wogan stop presenting Eurovision? 2008, 2009, 2007
- You are the representative for Greece. Who do you give 12 points to? Cyprus, Germany or Latvia?
- What year did Graham Norton first present Eurovision? 2009, 2010, 2008
- What country won in 2012? Sweden, Finland, France
- And with what song did they win? Euphoria, Desire, Despair?
- Are Australia in Eurovision? Yes, as of 2015, Yes, they are participating in next year’s contest, No,
- How many times have Finland won Eurovision? Once, Twice, Three times
- Which band did Finland last win Eurovision with? Lordi, Lady, Trolli?
- Which country has won the most times? Ireland, UK, Spain
- Which country is hosting Eurovision this year? Austria, Sweden, Denmark
- Yes, as of 2015
Scores: 1-3 = Nil Points. You came last no-one voted for you, but don’t worry it’s probably just because they hate your country. They have nothing against you personally. Maybe. 4-6 = middle of right side of voting table. Some people voted for you. It was only the people in your neighbouring country, but at least they did it because they wanted to and not because they had to, right? Right? 7-9 = Bottom of left side of the voting table. You’re on the same side of the table as the winners! But no-one cares because you’re not in the top three. Move out the way so people can take pictures of the winners. Go find the bar or something, I dunno. 10 points = You came third! Of course, you get nothing for coming third, but enough of the other at congratulate you and give you free drinks that you can get really drunk before you fly home tomorrow. 11 points = You came second! At the beginning of the voting you were first, but then everybody started giving 12 points to that damn dancing man in a mask. The damn dancing man in a mask was pretty cool though. Your country gave 12 points to it. Try again next year. 12 points = You won! Congratulations! You are top of the leader board and hosting Eurovision next year. Can your country afford it? Can they handle the pressure? Well you have to now. Congratulations (again) go and collect your prize!* *Prize may not exist. Sorry.